"Living with anorexia nervosa is like having
two competing people living in your head each feeding constant, contradictory
messages. The voices are so powerful and
convincing that it can be hard to differentiate
between ‘healthy’ messages and what are disordered/delusional thoughts. Constant thoughts and negotiations about food
and weight gain, exercise and whether or not you deserve or need help, make it
feel like someone is persistently yelling in your ears.
Describing to others what these voices
are like and the control they have over how you live your life can be
challenging. These voices and thoughts often get to the point where they
control a person’s mind 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. A person’s entire life
can be centered on this one issue which ultimately deprives them of all
pleasure in their life. Anxiety, depression, self harm and/or excessive compulsive
behaviours are all ways people deal with these voices. People also use food
restriction, eat only ‘healthy foods’ and/or exercise to minimise the intensity
and control of the voices.
When a person is at a low weight and
starving their body of the necessary fuel needed to function properly, the
louder and more powerful the voices and delusions become. Once body weight and
nutrition begins to normalise again these voices often diminish and become more
manageable. This is why monitored weight gain and adequate nutrition are
essential to one’s long-term recovery".
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